Tuesday, November 29, 2011

celebrating Today in its fullest

I've let myself grumble the past few days. 

Though it hasn't felt good, it has been good.

     I've experienced Freedom to choose.

I didn't *follow the rules* and be a good girl to choose gratefulness.

These days have revealed Truth: 
     Up until now I've chosen the safe path

Because someone invested in me, I responded with excitement at their attention-giving without considering my heart and the aches inside of me. I made professional choices based on what I felt I should do.

And the past several weeks months year (?), I've discovered a longing inside of me that no one has before mentioned I should do.

There's a longing deep inside of me that I can't even articulate. 
     Yet, it's one that tugs at me deeply, in the night as well as the day.

*Different* calls my name. 

As scary as it is to not even know what she is all about, I long for her.

I crave to live according to how I was created.

I long to live my heart's desires.

So, when the good girl inside me wants to be embarrassed over my attitude of late, I reach for His strength to choose Grace, instead.

Unwrapping Trust for the longing, and Freedom for the anxiousness.

tuesdays unwrapped at cats
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4 comments:

  1. I love, love, love this statement:

    I crave to live according to how I was created.

    Oh, so do I...

    Once again, I leave your place blessed...

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  2. Oh, yes, these longings are so hard to put onto words. And you do a beautiful job here. :). Thank you!!

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  3. I too am reaching for His strength, desiring to live my heart's desire!

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  4. Your post touches me deeply. I long to know the "real" me. I want to be accepted. I want to be different. Thanks for sharing. Joining in from Tuesdays Unwrapped.

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