Wednesday, October 5, 2011

fear gets noticed

This four legs of Different we have living among us is a sheer delight.

She follows us around and her name really should be named Velcro.
She nudges her way into our hand and finds cuddles, hugs and gentle rubs.
She speaks to us with smiles and even frowns.
She loves.

But this retired canine-momma has a few issues.

She has to have companionship when she's outside to do her *business.*

And, she has to have a tennis ball thrown from where we stand on the back deck--once to pee and twice for more significant potty. She always returns the ball to the deck before going back inside.

I've tried to break her of these silly-seeming quirks, but this simple attention is her mojo; it makes her feel secure.

One more thing about her, she is afraid. Not just shy, but afraid.

When we go out for our pre-dawn exercise she cowers when we walk by people, as if they're going to bite her or worse, talk!

It's taking quite a bit for this girl to get used to noise other than what belongs on farmland. In fact, just the other day I {nearly} broke a leg as she cut in front of me in response to the whoosh of the vehicles on the wet road. Twice.

I thought about how Fear gets noticed.

When I live in fear, my family gets involved. Inevitably, my hesitance pulls them in and suddenly they are involved.

When I question Every.Thing., and walk around with a shake in my step, my fear sometimes trips up the ones I love. Especially when fear makes me doubt even their love.

Fear may slow us down. And it may make us trip up on our own goals.

{whether our own fears or those of another.}

I thought our Gucci-girl was *over* being scared of the noises vehicles produce, and I was on a five-mile mission. But her fear made me cautious. I became aware of how I need to bend toward her sensitivities and surrender my goal for her comfort.

Fear makes us bend toward another.

My feet have blisters again because my gait has changed from handling this new companion. Though she trots along right next to me and the leash hangs loosely, her fears have me on edge and so I run a bit tentatively. We both do, actually.

Fear brings others into our lives.

It forces companionship.
Sometimes not immediately, but always eventually.

We weren't made to live in fear. Conversely, we were made to share life with others. And so, there's this amazing power behind relationships--they give freedom to live, even among the fear.

Joy can be present even though we're not sure which way to go and fear has us timid for each step.

Like my new pup, we can be all tongue hanging out and tail wagging in pleasure when we have a good friend to coach us that it'll be okay, and assuring us that we're Good Girl(s).

I think this miracle in relationships is the evidence of God inside us.

Companionship says I accept you, and that includes the fears.
And accepting helps the fears to ease {a little bit}.

I receive this truth--fear doesn't make me a bad girl.

My Father allows me to have feelings and He loves me just the same.
His presence in my life gives me courage and those fears lessen as I trust.



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3 comments:

  1. Ah, the missteps of my fearful walk. Or the sometimes missed view of my "confident" walk. Walking with Him, always, is best. Loved your post. Thank you!

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  2. I love what you said, "amazing power behind relationships--they give freedom to live, even among the fear." Yes, my fear lessens as I trust HIM!! Great post!

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