an invitation to a social project

There's this vision that I have of a movement of humans all across the world making a choice that is truly transformational in the way they do and experience life.

People all over the world are tired and worn out in life. 

Drug use is at record levels, both prescriptions and otherwise, by people of all types and classes. It's also evidenced in the profound use of alcohol, especially the go-to wine in the evening after the day and often even in the day that has become a socially acceptable answer to everything from celebration to struggles.

And then there's the depression and emotional taxation of life that has wearied and burdened people to the point of not knowing what other choices they have and how they can possibly even get out of bed.

Parents are avoiding confrontation with their kids because the conversations are always so tough and life always feels so hard. Young people are feeling lonely and as though they've been abandoned by their own family, left by themselves to sort out their confusion and fear of what they see happening all around them by themselves, and coming to the point of feeling like life isn't worth it. Parents often don't even know what their kids are doing, how late they're staying up, what they're eating, or most especially--how they are feeling.

People all over the world are too exhausted to be honest about the truth of how they feel. 

Make-up on and hair coloring is an expected social norm in an attempt to coverup the effects of life that may give signs of weakness. People are doing whatever it takes to present themselves as though they've got it all together.

To face the truth about feelings feels too uncomfortable.

To do the work of unearthing the thoughts that have burdened them feels too exhausting.

The mere idea that it is possible to live at rest makes a person's salivary glands go into overdrive and tingle at the back of their jaw. People are hungry for rest but have sensory overload even thinking about it.

          What if people all over the world decide to accept life as it is, instead of fighting it?

          What if people all over the world decide to accept their own selves as they are--
               instead of fighting their own truth and hiding and pretending?

          What if people all over the world decide to accept the gift of love--
               without trying to prove themselves as worthy?

          What if people all over the world decide to lay down their stories--
               of regret, hurt, disappointment, resentment, anxiousness, and fear?

          What if people all over the world decide to accept that they belong, as they are?

          What if people all over the world decide to accept each experience--
               trusting that all is meant to serve?

          What if people all over the world decide to accept each other's differences--
               seeing one another as a teacher?

          What if people all over the world decide to accept the storm--
               trusting that it is producing something beautiful, as brutal as it may feel? 

          What if people all over the world decide to accept life--as it is? 

          What if people all over the world decide to accept themselves--and live as they are? 

The vision that I have of this movement of people making a life-transforming choice is a social project called The C'est La Vie Project.

This project is a creative coming together of people forming communities that are so close they are like family. People actually dare to open up the tent flaps of their heart, inviting others inside--people who they know, and who they don't know; people like them, and people who are different. In this coming together, people share and then listen to each other's truth without judgment.

I imagine this project of being together in family feeling like being at home in which people kick their shoes off and put their feet up and sigh with relief that they can simply be, as they are.

C'est La Vie as I describe it is a truthful reflection of life as it is. It's an invitation to come and get to know the real one another in which love is shared, experienced, and known. It's a tool for connection--an answer to the hunger of wanting to be seen, known, and accepted.

The C'est La Vie Project is an invitation to share the unique ways we curate our life, as though we are living magazines--a dare to live sprawled out, as we are.

This, I imagine.

a birthing of a God-sized dream

Stories connect to other stories and suddenly there's an afghan-length of thread to sort through with the beginning knit so tightly with all the others that it's unrecognizable. Such is the way with how to navigate where the journey began for me to discover the simplicity, breadth and depth of love.

For a long time I tried to be a fixer -- of situations, of circumstances, of hearts, of people. I lived a lot of my first 35 years as an anxious person who tried to control every single thing, including people.

The truth is, no matter how hard I try there's quite possibly someone I won't please, or something that I've overlooked, or a better way. Still, I expended an inordinate amount of energy on a highly unlikely outcome of perfection; it was a bit like insanity.

Eventually I realized how completely exhausting it is to constantly be on the lookout for brokenness. I sat there with all that wasn't whole and considered what it might mean to simply and fully loose all that I grasped with my hands.

Like a bird set free, my unfurled fingers gave permission for dreams and wants and visions to fly away . . . for me and even for others. 

This unfurling made space for new things to find their way in my hand and new people to find their way into my heart; things and people I hadn't anticipated or even considered.

In the loosing, I went through a period of grief in which my tendencies were shaken. Muscles were learning a new way of being, no longer constantly constricted. I learned to be patient with myself as I navigated this new way of living. Still, I found myself afraid of the openness that became of the new-found space in my hand and was tempted to grip those fingers tight again. The joy I felt was almost too much to bear.

The restful state I was living in was almost dream-like and I feared waking up from a slumber that resembled a fantasy-like world because, surely, I thought, the bottom would eventually fall out. I was afraid of living happy-clappy and not being prepared enough for the hard times, so I tried to brace myself and quickly realized that it was the reverting back to a constricted way of living.

Slowly, I discovered that there are people surrounding me who actually love me as I am; I don't have to do anything or be anyone differently.

There are people who see something in my brokenness that is more beautiful than I'll ever see. 

People who think that I am perfectly imperfect. People who accept me and adore me. Period.

I had slammed the windows shut and bolted the door tight so many of those people would stop looking at me and talking to me and thinking of me. Because I imagined I was a nuisance and a pest, a hypocrite who wanted to change and who couldn't. And then one day I thought about how lonely it feels to always be by myself, running from here to there and making it a sport. So, I chose to open the windows and let in the cool breeze. I opened the door and let in all the people. It was one of those moments when I decided to test God and see if I really would be okay.

And it felt like nakedness, I tell you.

Letting people in made me want to scream: Hand-me-a-bathrobe-please! Because it's scary to be standing there all red in the face and raw from the tight-grip life. It's vulnerable and incredibly uncomfortable. Yet, those people knew all of that about me before I did. And they stayed. I didn't need to send out invitations to welcome people back in, they were just there -- smiling and cheering for me the whole time.

I used to not want to be seen anywhere I went. 

I'd wear a baseball cap and flit my eyes around people to the "others" I presumed were more important. I avoided fitness centers and churches and coffee shops and parades. I wanted to be among but to actually be incognito. Secretly, I wanted to be seen and known, and deep inside I begrudged the people who just didn't try hard enough to see through my tough-girl image. I had created a story in which I made myself the victim and everyone else the villain.

I realized a lot as I considered all the people who remained in my life even though I tried to hide. Though I cannot control the future, I can choose how I react to today. I can hold my hand open and my fingers loose for whatever might find a new perch with me, or let what needs to fly away simply go, all the while living in a state of rest. I can trust God with me, as I am, and with my life, as it is. I learned that love looks at a person with empathy and says, "I get you more than you realize" and "I've been there, too".

Love allows us to hope even when we fear.

Love bolsters us in the midst of fear in a way that doesn't hide the truth of potential reality
     . . . and love reminds us that it is safe to celebrate joy, as it is.

Love knows that we're all humans starving for grace.
Love knows that no one is better than another.
Love knows that we all have something about us that makes us needy and needed.

I started letting my face show and my voice be heard, and you know what? I didn't die. My worst fears didn't come true.

I was most surprised at the head nods and me-too's that I heard, affirming that I belong and I matter. 

As it turns out, that feeling of nakedness is actually quite freeing (though I promise you that I won't be making it habit to streak bare-butted across my neighborhood.)

Nowadays I like the girl I see in the mirror; I love her, in fact. I accept her and treasure her, as. she. is.

And nowadays, though I honestly still struggle with grasping for control and find that my muscles twitch in a restless-like way as they continue to learn how to rest and simply let things (and especially people) be, as they are, I am passionate about encouraging others to loose their tightly gripped fists and to simply accept their lives, as. it. is.

When we decide not to fix the brokenness and simply be, we reflect that we trust that the One who created us designed us with deliberate intention.

And when we embrace ourselves as we are, our lives reflect a living worship; the real kind that says, "I receive your love. You are enough for me."

Might we embrace our stories as they are.
Might we seek to know God and find peace.
Might we redefine strong and bravely live naked, trusting Him -- as we are.

: : : 

I said "Yes" to a crazy vision that didn't make any sense to me.

Slowly, passion and joy for this God-sized dream unfurled.

Birthed today, this here is a collection of hearts who have chosen to embrace life, as it is --
     . . . this is C'est La Vie: The Magazine:

Visit C'est La Vie: The Magazine on Facebook. 

a trust thing

When you chase so hard after something you are certain is part of your story --

. . . and you find that it's not what you wanted, necessarily,
          it's just what you believed would be true . . .

. . . and all those years of worrying that you might possibly be wrong,
          that there's no guarantee your dreams will ever come to be . . .

. . . and something monumental actually does happen . . .

. . . and it happens in you . . .

Such was the case with me.

: : : 

I wanted to believe.
I wanted to know God is real.
I wanted to know in my own knock-my-socks-off way.

I thought I wasn't good enough, that perhaps He was annoyed and irritated with me like I was with myself, and like I imagined so many other people were with me.
   
All my fears, all the anxiety I carried around with me . . . it all became asked of me as possibilities to consider.

     What if my groom dies while we're still in the midst of raising him?

     What if our son dies?

     What if we die and leave him alone?

     What if I lose my job?

     What if I get sick and die?

     What if this dream never comes true?

     What if I never have the close relationships I longed for all those years?

To face fear is the only way to move through it. 

To avoid it or be quiet about it, only allows it to stick around longer and take up residence, keeping me frozen.

Do I trust Him? That is actually the real question to all my anxiety.

I always made every anxiety about Me.

I tried to ensure certain possibilities by eating a certain way, or working out a certain way, or learning all I can to fix all the things.

What if it isn't really about me?

What if someone in the crossfires of my story actually needs to be there for God to do some miraculous work in their lives?

What if the challenges my groom and I face with our son are really the way God will draw Boy-Man to His heart?

What if my imperfections are a way for someone else -- possibly someone who isn't even within my close knit circle -- to see the Hand and Face of God?

Do I trust Him with life, as it is?

: : : 

I think about the times I've lived reckless, the times I threw my hands up and pitched a little fit, pretending I didn't care. I contrast those choices with how my life is at this very moment and I am utterly amazed, incredibly humbled, and in slack-jawed awe.

Where my life is at is nothing short of a miracle. It is most definitely a reflection of the Hand of God, there is simply no other explanation. Because, I certainly haven't done enough good to be here, and it certainly can't be luck that brought me here.

My life is a reflection of Grace that says I am loved, as I am. 

There is nothing I need do to earn favor when my heart longs to honor Him, even though I can tend to selfishly want what I want.

I've realized that I can trust Him.

I can be naked, fully exposing who I am
     . . . and I will be held
     . . . safe and secure.

the long journey to peace, to Life

Several years ago I was given a dream that felt comfy and exciting.

Through a painful process and time, I learned the importance of patience and trust.

I thought surely God must be cruel because I even prayed the desire would go away and still, it remained.

How could I possibly be given such a desire and yet be waiting, still, more than a handful of years later?

I felt tortured -- gutted and raw -- and in that vulnerable state I was faced with a decision.

     Do I keep trying to make this dream happen?
          Or do I simply wait and trust?

     But what if it doesn't happen?
          What if it turns out my dream is something I made up?

There were times when I wanted to run away from everything in my life and even crawl into a me-size grave and fall asleep forever.

It seemed easier to just divert my eyes from the dream and even ignore the tugs at my heart. 

I nearly destroyed my marriage and gave up my child, thinking I wasn't good enough for the dream that hounded me, and perhaps I wasn't even good enough for them.

I gathered us three and we pursued a new place to live with wide open spaces and sunshine nearly everyday. I felt free and started to learn what life is like without the familiar memories from my growing up years. I thought I needed a fresh start and a new me.

Within two years we turned ourselves right back around and ended up in the last place I ever wanted to be -- Home.

The community where I was raised now felt scarier than ever. Everyone remembered the "before me" and I feared they wouldn't see the newness of me.

As it turned out, though I could sense the change deep below the surface, the "new me" was still only a seed. There would be a handful more years to live through until I would bloom and beauty would unfurl.

God asked me if I would stay with the man He allowed me to marry, even if I was sometimes irritated or annoyed by the discomfort of living with someone different than me.

My answer was a vehement "No!" at one point.

He had asked me numerous times to let go of the dream I tried to coerce him into making happen. Time and again I'd try to let go, only to fail over and over again; I just couldn't make this wanting go away.

I tried to coerce my groom to give up on me, convinced I was otherwise just postponing the inevitable because surely he would get frustrated with me enough to eventually give up.

Eventually, I realized my groom was right. What seemed like a good thing had become an obsession. It was my fear of thinking I wasn't good enough that was infiltrating into every single aspect of my life, including my interactions and relationship with him.

I needed to consider letting the dream go and trust that I am good enough, as I am.
     But how?

After actually trying to make my groom go, I finally realized something profound: He stayed.

     No matter how many glasses I threw and broke . . .
     Or how many times I careened out of our driveway and down the street in reckless anger . . .
     Or how much I yelled unfair accusations and ugly, colorful words at him . . .

The man who committed his life to me actually stayed.

I finally understood he was honest all the times his words said my curves were attractive and my edges weren't all there is about me. Most especially, I finally understood my groom's love is genuine when he gave me the space to process out loud.

Even though my behavior certainly hasn't been "good," it turns out I am good enough -- as I am. 

I courageously received his love, choosing to believe him and set my doubts free. After nearly 14-years, I finally married him last summer . . . this time, in my heart.

: : : 

Over a year ago I imagined sitting on a front porch with my hands cupped around a warm cup of tea, and seeing storm clouds slowly make their way across the sky.

I could feel the angst in me as the storm clouds began to whirl and twirl, and I considered making my way inside my house where I would find safety and comfort from my groom. Since he had become a person who I (finally) found rest in being with, my initial reaction was to go inside since a storm was about to brew and let him calm my restless heart.

Just then, I felt a stirring in me to stay, as if it were an invitation.

     Wait.

More storm clouds. More whirling and twirling.

     Will you stay? 
          Even now . . . in the midst of the storm . . . will you stay? 

     Will you trust Me? 
          I will teach you to rest, in the midst of the storm . . . now, as it is . . . 

The clouds thickened and the sky grew ever darker in my imagined moment, and I started to consider what happens during a storm.

I thought of the moment when the storm clouds part and the brilliant colors poke through the darkened canvas of the sky. That parting in the sky doesn't last long and it's sometimes really easy to miss, especially when we're tucked safe inside where it's more comfortable to weather a storm.

Brilliant orange and pink colors make their way through the clouds, though their beauty is not always indicative of the end of a storm. There is beauty in the midst. And we could miss it.

As if it's a reminder to Hope, the call to stay teaches us we can trust and rest. 

This vision grew a passion within me to encourage others to stay . . . to Chase Hope in the midst of the storm -- not necessarily for the storm to end and the hard story to be pretty-bow tied, but rather to stay long enough to see the beauty in the midst of the fog and the grey.

     To hope for His glory to be revealed in some way, even if it's not as we would design it to be.

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion?
Come to me.
Get away with me and you'll recover life.
I'll show you how to take a real rest. 
Walk with me and work with me -- watch how I do it. 
Learn the unforced rhythms of Grace.
I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. 
Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
(Matthew 11:28 The Message)

: : : 

Soon after the storm vision, I was given a dream that I tried to fling wide onto someone else . . . anyone else. It kicked at my insides like a strange-feeling butterfly just waiting to bust out and fly.

     I itched and scratched, restless and irritated.

This dream just didn't make sense. It wasn't comfortable or exciting. It was annoying and just sounded like work that would interrupt my now quiet, and rested soul. I didn't need to prove anything or achieve anything anymore. I was happy and content with life, as it was.

     Still, I itched.

This irritating "dream" kept kicking me in the belly like a fetus in utero. Though I didn't want to admit it could be real, I simply had to pay attention to this.

     Develop a magazine . . . and name it, "C'est La Vie" -- life, as it is.

     Use this to envelope others around what you've discovered:

          . . . that you can trust me, and you can rest
          . . . even in the midst of life's storms.

It was settled. I would yield.

The journey I lived brought me to a passionate understanding that I can trust Our Creator -- God. I learned that I can rest, even as the battle rages and the storm billows.

I began to believe I am good enough, as I am. 

"Strong" was redefined for me.

I now see Strong as the courage to hold all things loose and to trust God -- hoping -- not for a happy storybook ending, but rather for peace

     . . . even in the midst of the storm
     . . . even if the storm never ends
     . . . even if the dreams my heart longs for never come true.

God gave me the desire to develop a magazine that seeks to dethrone the typical, glossy ones telling readers how to have the perfect body, the perfect children, the perfect house, the perfect marriage, the perfect sex . . . the perfect life -- as if theirs simply isn't good enough, as it is.

"C'est La Vie: The Magazine," the dream God planted within my heart and that I resisted, will be birthed about the time my 10-plus year dream of having another child will be born, the dream I tried to make go away and that remained through the years -- even after my hard surrender.

Having a second child wasn't something I necessarily wanted. It was a dream I believed with all my heart God wanted for us. I wanted it so badly just because I thought it would prove He is real. I imagined saying, "Look! See? God did this! He is real!"

If there's anything my journey taught me, it's that I don't need a baby to prove God is real. 

"C'est La Vie: The Magazine" reminds us that our greatest offering is to unwrap the grace to simply be -- as. we. are. -- and to trust God has purpose for life -- as. it. is.

His heart cry is for us to know we can trust Him . . . we can rest.

     What if I didn't say "Yes"?
     What if I didn't stay?

     What if I didn't choose courage to see what it is God had to show me?

It makes me want to throw up even thinking about how different my life might look right now if I hadn't chosen to surrender my comfort and step with God into the fog-laden path of life.

Deep contentment and joy for life has finally overwhelmed me. I might not always feel this secure, even though I know He will always hold me and keep me safe.

Even if the deep fears that try to niggle at me end up coming true, I know there will be sufficient Grace when I need it.

I don't have to imagine the worst in an attempt to prepare myself for a possible hardship. God will comfort me and He will be enough. Besides, I could never prepare enough for what His Grace wants to show me.

Even in the midst of the storm, He will cascade beauty across the canvas of our sky.

Christianity as I knew it was disassembled in my life. In its place is faith -- genuine faith.

After many years, I finally came to see the wait for my dream as a gift. I didn't need the dream to happen anymore. The journey was about so much more. I now know I am treasured and deeply loved -- as I am.

After such an ugly and hard journey of stubbornness and fear-living, a beautiful peace washed over me to accept my story -- as it is. 

"C'est La Vie: The Magazine" is about to make its debut, and soon thereafter will my second son.

I don't need to see what either of these dreams end up looking like in order to love them now.

Joy and gratitude has come to me without needing to see the proof. 

As these dreams grow their lungs, I imagine them scream: Look at what God did!

     I can already hear their screams of Glory . . . of Life.

Linking with Jennifer

filling the seats :: an invitation (3 of 3)

C'est La Vie: The Magazine Raw life. Real worship . . . Life, as. it. is. willingness For so long, the mirror was the voice for my thoughts. I'd let what my eyes saw judge my worth and determine if I was good enough. The shape of my body on any given day would tell me if I ate good enough or worked out hard enough. My groom's facial expressions, tone, and the words he'd say to me would be my guide to whether I am wise in my application of the lessons I'd learned. Other people's successes would be a barometer for my own successes. God has purposed me, as I am. He asks me to consider my love for Him and worship Him, alone. What He most wants is for me to be. I have decided to worship Him in the ways I'm simply me: Messy. Scatter-brained. Hypocritical. He makes a message out of my messes. He makes creativity out of my chaos. He makes history out of my humanity. Fear doesn't deserve the power we sometimes give it. I've nearly forced myself to be and act and look a certain way, only to realize that I will never be good enough for the standards of this world. No matter how much I try, I will always come up short in some area. C'est La Vie: The Magazine will envelope community around the Real in big life issues, bringing the hard stuff to the surface and snuffing out shame. Talking about all issues surrounding race and gender, light will be shined upon the outcast and the shunned, and invites all people who are willing to go there -- every kind of heritage who are willing to share their stories: of privilege, naiveté, anger, disgrace. The featured Gritty Story writers will speak directly of redemption and grace in the midst of chaos and confusion, tackling the question "What are you learning about Him now, in the midst . . . while this story is unfinished and incomplete?" C'est La Vie: The Magazine will speak to men and women who quietly wonder if they are enough, who long to be superheroes, and who God says: "You. Already. Are." will you join us? In order for this God-sized dream to happen, we will need a lot of puzzle pieces to come together. The thing is, we don't have the box to know what the puzzle even looks like, exactly and we don't even know what pieces go where.  This is our invitation for you to join our Tribe Network. => Are you willing to be a part of a community that encourages through truth-telling; that sometimes makes the days seem even harder by going to the uncomfortable places? We're looking for passion, commitment and dedication. Realizing this is a lot to ask of volunteers, we're trusting that God will provide. Right now we have two immediate needs, followed by a close third. Other roles will be filled over time; however, these three roles are the first to be put into action. Some of these roles will be ongoing, while others will be intense in the early phase and taper off to supporting roles, and some won't even formally begin until right before the website portion of C'est La Vie launches ( . . . and then there will be a whole other group for the printed magazine, the ultimate vision!). Immediate Need #1 :: Graphic Design Diva/Dude -- someone who can design a website background and a graphic identity for C'est La Vie: The Magazine, both for the on line hostel and ultimately for the print version. Immediate Need #2 :: Website Wordpress Wizard -- someone who loves Wordpress CSS and can craft a working framework for C'est La Vie's on line hostel. On-Deck :: Usher -- someone skilled in organization and communication to provide administrative assistance and coordination, own and manage the calendar, keep folks in the know, and connect groups together around projects. what you should know Until we have our platform designed and in place, we will continue to dream and pray and wait on the Lord. That said, we are taking steps to build the C'est La Vie Tribe, believing God will meet all our needs at exactly the time when we need them. We've developed an involvement profile for those interested in partnering with us as a way to build our Tribe Network, helping us better identify the role that each person might be best suitable for, based on our specific needs. This is our deliberate attempt to fill the roles with the talent needed to best fulfill them. Should you decide to use our tool, you'll need to carve out 15-20 minutes and give some thoughtful attention to the questions. If the survey feels awkward, clumsy, or just not right for you, feel free to drop us a note to share your heart . . . or a note to set up a time to chat about your heart. A few important points: => While we thank everyone who will be brave enough to raise a hand, we cannot promise that there will be a spot for everyone. => Once we prayerfully consider and determine who goes where, we'll take time to get to know everyone as they settle into their roles, and arrange for regular check-ins. => We will empower each team member to work independently and each sub-team to work collaboratively on their portion of work until check-in. => While you're praying and dreaming about your place and your role here, we'll be spending ours leaning in, listening, and loosing our hold so God remains in control. => As He leads, we'll be reaching out to folks who raised their hands to fill particular roles, provide specifics on what those roles entail, and most especially pray continually about filling them. => I know how hard it will be to wait for the activation of your role if you're a "doer" like we are, however, we've agreed that it is absolutely critical that we are patient for God's leading in all of this. We stand with a healthy restlessness, awaiting His Direction for His pace. => As it stands right now, the launch date of the on line hostel will be in early 2015. We'll continue to adapt our timeline, knowing He can speed it up or slow it down. call to action 1) Consider your heart, and the nudging, and those fears, and all the pockets of time in your day . . . 2) Thoughtfully let us know if you feel led and are equipped to meet one of our most pressing and needed roles, or if there's another that niggles at you most of all. => Please take some time to give us a profile of your strengths through the Tribe Network we developed. => You may also send a separate note directly to C'est La Vie: The Magazine. 3) Was someone on your heart as soon as you read a role description? Please forward this to that person. We need you to share, just as much as we need you to consider your own involvement in this dream. : : : We influence, for His glory. God takes our willingness to talk about projects like this and plants seeds within the people around us. We firmly believe that C'est La Vie: The Magazine will be important in very real and specific ways that we cannot even begin to imagine -- for all those who come to the table to commune with us . . . the development, launch, and management teams, as well as the readers. Sign-up to receive future newsletters. Direct questions and comments to: cest.la.vie.the.magazine@gmail.com In case you missed it: in spite of fear :: an invitation (1 of 3) a creative mess :: an invitation (2 of 3)

a creative mess :: an invitation (2 of 3)

C'est La Vie: The Magazine Raw life. Real worship . . . Life, as. it. is. on fear and purpose I haven't felt good enough for my own dreams sometimes. Thinking I'm not old enough, experienced enough or good enough, I've kept my hands clenched tight around my dreams, as though it's a precious wubby I can't let go. For a long time, shame told me I should be better, wrangling me with restrictions and rules I was never able to fulfill. Too often I waited for fear to go away before I obeyed God's call. Making a decision to obey based on how I feel says I know better than Him. I'm learning that fear is not worth the wait. Regardless of whether fear was invited or not, it is purposed. Fear can add tremendous value to my life. It challenges me, helps me to consider different perspectives, and sometimes serves as a guardrail to warn me of impending dangers. Fear is also the house guest known to overstay her welcome. It doesn't have the power it thinks it deserves to decide what I should or shouldn't do, influence my every decision, or evaluate me. Even though fear doesn't pick up and leave when it's convenient for me or when I think I need it to, I still need to get on with the work I am charged to do. I can't put an "on vacation" sign on my life until this house guest decides to leave. learning to trust God specifically crafted me knowing the tendencies and habits I would have, yet He still charged me with specific responsibilities. He asks for me to honor Him by living out the specificity of His design in ways specifically designed for me. He knew before He created me that I would be messy and popcorn brain in thought. He sees beyond my messes and imperfections, and He purposes them in such a way that reveals the amazing grace that is His love. God created me perfectly imperfect for a specific purpose. There will always be days when I question whether I'm in the right place and the right fit for the responsibility. Fear sometimes keeps me from saying exactly what I really mean, or really wish to say. When I make a choice based on fear, chances are I'll make the wrong -- every single time. I want to shout from the mountains and run through the streets, grabbing every person I come into contact with and tell them: As ugly as this storm might look, I assure you, you will see beauty! In spite of the storm clouds that threaten your peace, there is brilliant beauty and purpose and grace in this. Fear's huffiness and assumptions leave me feeling exhausted and not good enough. It barges into the margins of my day and demands attention that I simply can't give it. I need boundaries for discipline to stay focused and deliberate about how I believe God is calling me to spend each allotted day. All. Is. Purposed. This isn't just a bumper sticker cliche. I've seen the ways God has made beauty from the broken parts of me. It's difficult for people to keep up with my messy ideas that sometimes don't make sense or appear practical to the present situation. Truth tells me that my voice matters, even though what I say might not be fully understood. Fear needs to be my silent partner. loosing fears and saying "Yes!" Dreams don't mean anything if they aren't pursued. Like the china sitting in the cabinet that might someday get used, we sometimes put dreams in pretty boxes with a cute little ribbon and remark about her beauty. We wait for the day when our schedules or we feel more deserving or worthy. I wholeheartedly believe that God charged me with a vision that is beyond my capacity, though is something that I need to step into with bold, confident, trust. I believe He called me to lead a team around a God-sized dream that will: unleash and empower men and women to freely live their uniquely created lives. A steady drip of truth as each story is presented as a broken offering, C'est La Vie: The Magazine will remind us that our greatest offering is to unwrap the grace to simply be, as. we. are., resting in the truth that He purposes and refines us, for His glory. A printed compilation of stories lived Real and bold, featuring writers who reflect on the process God allows in His making of us, C'est La Vie honors the time He knows we need for Him to sift and edit us through the tornado-like moments of life; much like the process of creating art. A sprawling declaration of raw worship through gritty, brazen, undisputed, fully human storytelling, C'est La Vie celebrates no-limits grace that frees and unleashes all people to embrace life, as. it. is. The ultimate dream is a print magazine for the reader to sip and to savor . . . to contemplate and consider the shared and very real, gritty, messy, broken, shamed, and fear-laced human stories. It can be cut apart to inspire in small bites or in whole, much like He does with us. A print magazine allows the reader to find in her 15-minute vacation of the bathroom, where she needs just a few minutes alone, the truth in knowing she's not alone in her struggles. building a tribe C'est La Vie is for men and women, alike, speaking from and supporting perspectives of both genders, as it serves to open the lines of communication and develop a better understanding of one another. We're building a tribe of men and women to join us in developing C'est La Vie: The Magazine . . . First we'll build an on line hostel, of sorts -- a place of refuge that feeds and shelters those from the storm of life with radical unconditional love and acceptance of community -- serving as a safe respite for the gritty storytellers who are willing to stand in the arena of truth, in spite of fear . . . presenting life as art and the idea that process is necessary. We're building a tribe who is willing to explore and pursue hope with us . . . who believes faith is the main thing and fear is meant to be a silent partner. => Have you experienced a part in your story where the clouds stormed in and threatened your peace and where now, on the other side, or even in the midst, you can see brilliant beauty? => Do you ache to tell the story of redemption that comes through ridiculous pain because you know there is purpose? : : : Stay tuned in the coming days . . . More information will come your way letting you know how you can declare your interest in being part of the tribe developing C'est La Vie: The Magazine. In the mean time: ASK :: How did He make you? Ask God to tell you more about what specific strengths and talents He gave you. BE :: You matter, as you are. Simply be. CONSIDER :: May your offering be your willingness for "whatever" God invites you to be a part of today. Direct questions and comments to: cest.la.vie.the.magazine@gmail.com In case you missed it: in spite of fear :: an invitation (1 of 3)