Wednesday, May 25, 2011

All Things New

My best friend wrote about the beginning of the story of our friendship. And honestly, I learned a lot when I read her viewpoint. I struggled to remember much of anything from those days.

Because that's what grace does. It covers. It heals.

Grace makes {all things} new. 

The friendship we began with was out of wanting to please my soon-to-be groom. Out of his suggestion I took a step of courage and wrote to her, exploring whether we could be friends. 

Looking back now, I see this as a thin place where God stepped in

While at the same college, she was the friend I couldn't be for my future groom while we were apart. Even though they shared their time with other friends of theirs, they still bonded and though nothing ever happened more than that, they shared a connection of the spirit and teetered on knowing what was evolving between them just wasn't right. Their time together represented an emotional affair of sorts. 

I had known the two of them had been spending time together, and I suspected their relationship was developing into a close friendship like the one he and I once had years prior. Jealousy made me afraid for what they shared, because our own relationship was changing. 

It was a difficult time in my relationship with my future groom, and for years I've blamed myself for the closeness he had with her, believing I drew him toward her by tempting him away from me. Though I can't recall the details well, I do know that I wasn't good to my future groom. Maybe I was harsh. Commanding. Demanding. Afraid. And as a result, we grew distant and flirted toward separate paths.

I didn't feel good enough to be his friend, no less his bride-to-be. She was better. She was kinder and simpler with less emotional baggage than me.

We almost didn't get married. 

And my friendship with her almost never even began. 

But, grace stepped in

Now, we've all lived a decade into our story of this grace, both in marriage and friendship.

Stay tuned for more...

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This is the third in a seven-part series on friendship and grace.  


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