the drive-thru is junk

A close friend sent me a message in response to what I wrote about struggling with friendships.  I was reminded that our friendship has taken ten years to get to where it is now.

Ten years is a lot of investing.

Friendship is an investment.  

This is a powerful truth.  It takes focus to really understand what that means.

In this world of quick, easy, convenient, painless, instant gratification, I wonder if we're missing the point...

In this world where many of us [children included!] stay up late and awaken tired...when many reach for a cereal bar and think it's a meal, I wonder if we're missing out on savoring and appreciating when meals are often eaten on-the-go...

In this world facing a crisis of obesity [at all ages]...when McDonald is being chosen as the quickest, easiest way to feed our family [or ourselves], I wonder if the dinner table is converting to mission control, rather than a place inviting meaningful conversation...

In this world of insanely over-booked schedules [for our children!], I wonder if we're really using our children as an excuse to not make time for others, and if we're hiding behind our children versus being real...

In this world of waving hello and calling it a friendship, I wonder what we're teaching our children about taking time...

And most of all, in this world where many of us {still} have friendship-issues, and we just want to hide because we never feel good enough...I wonder if there's more we can do for ourselves [and others].

We need to invest.  

The drive-thru is not made for solid healthy friendships...or true relationships of any kind.

The drive-thru friendship is not enough to nourish.  

The drive-thru friendship isn't anything other than junk-food for the soul.

Carving out time to sit down and not be rushed is an investment.  

Allowing conversations to occur that are real, is like peas and carrots to the soul.  Gossiping about others and complaining about our schedule, our kids, our husband, our jobs, our laundry, our to-do lists...that's just like eating donuts, and it doesn't sustain us.  

Investing takes effort, time, energy, patience, and most of all...time to grow.  

What are you feeding your relationships? 

make your marriage a *work of art*

Imagine your marriage as a work of art.  Because it is.

What you do with your canvas - your years with your partner - is your worship.

Imagine the colors and texture left behind by the story you have lived.

As much as today seems like it's {just} about the regular, ol' mundane every. day charades -

wiping faces, blowing noses, potty training, homework coaching, teaching manners, disciplining child-like behavior, {trying to} accept child-like attitudes, keeping a well intentioned schedule, exemplifying good eating habits, making time to read before bed, making sure baths are taken (and done well), tucking little pitter-patters into bed, helping to develop character in our little ones, {trying to find a way to} pay the bills, working, cleaning, fixing, planning,  -

It's about so much more.

I know life feels like it's all about that long list, and more.  But it isn't.

Your life is much more than the {just seems like} merry-go-round-of-days.

Though I still have a child at home and long for another to grow, nurture, groom and guide - I know that my sole purpose isn't to be a Mama.  I was made for more than this.

I imagine what our house will sound like when there are no children laughing, running, spilling, jumping, whining, crying, teasing, or asking to wrestle.  Because someday there won't be.  And it will be quiet(er), again.

And so I choose to focus on my groom.  And our time together.  And our canvas of days.

I don't want to make up for the years when we've {only} invested ourselves in child rearing.  And though it seems so far away from now, it isn't really.  And there are no guarantees that we'll even have that long together - or event tomorrow.

Time moves {really} fast when we're in the living and {bad} stuff can happen.

More than that, there's purpose in my relationship with my Groom - purpose today for even more than raising our child(ren).  What we do for {each} other(s), and how we interact with others - what our "one thing" is together - that's what counts even more.

What if we focused on the more?  What if we deliberately chose colors to paint in the days that make our marriage?

Invest in your time together - today.  

Let him touch you.

Let him accept you - just the way you are.

Accept him for all he is, today.

Let the truth he speaks drown out all the doubt.

Make time together.

Pray together.

Dream together.

Be creative together.

Be in the moment.

Pay attention to him.

Keep your eyes fixed on what is important.

Show up.  Every. Day.

Maybe you could watch a movie together...play a game when the kiddos go to bed...make time for lunch together, often...find an activity you both enjoy and do it together...save some energy for him each day and give him your best attitude...spend a whole day together, regularly...

Simply - invest.  

Because, your marriage really is worth it.  Every bit of time, as difficult as it is - it matters.