Wednesday, July 13, 2011

living my trust

It's the time when we talk the most.

He gets me to Himself and speaks to me quiet-like and gentle. I See how He is my Father when I am on an early morning run--when I lean close and seek His counsel.

An hour together in this way leaves me speechless and my heart transformed.

I trust you, Father. 

And I do.

He challenges me about this *trusting*--why don't I live it? 

Nearly tripping over my own garbled mess of unnecessary excuses, I find no answer.

Do I think I can do better than Him?
Do I not think I need Him?
Do I feel shame for needing Him?

I wonder why the surrendering feels so difficult to live.

My Father has my best in His plans. Sometimes it might look spooky or daunting at how cavernous of a place He wants to take me, and yet I always See the purpose--His purpose.

It's there--His *purpose*--in Every. Thing.

He invites me to live my trust. He talks with me about what that looks like.

And, I begin to See ...

There's relief in this space of trusting--true *Freedom* to Rest. 

1 comment:

  1. I think the surrendering is difficult for all of us, because we have a will, a mind and a spirit. We are made in God's image after all. And in our culture we like to know all the answers, plan accordingly, predict the future, while overemphasizing our need for security.

    And God just IS. Speaking for myself, I struggle with that "being" as opposed to "doing".