Friday, October 30, 2009

Trust. Not fear.

I just looked out the window and saw that it is “raining”…yellow leaves! The beautiful Fall is about to end, as the trees will soon be stripped and winter will settle upon us. I just held my breath and couldn’t breathe for a minute. I’m afraid a little. I don’t want the leaves to go away. They’re just leaves, but still…I don’t want them to go away and I’m afraid of what the winter will be like. Fall has been hard. What will winter be like?

The answer is BEAUTIFUL. Fall was beautiful, despite being difficult. The leaves…the one thing I am sad to see blown off the trees…were one of those sunshine’s in the storm of life this Fall. The brilliant yellow colors couldn’t help but lift my spirits and give me praise to the One who planned all that I have gone through…and all I will go through. I was very much aware of the squirrels this Fall, and how they were scurrying around (never seeming to know which way to go) and now I think about how they were preparing for Winter. They were having fun sometimes, sure, but they were also preparing their nests for winter.

Hmmm…I guess I could learn a lot from silly squirrels scurrying around!

So much could be said here. But I’ll choose to go with this…there’s no need to fear. Winter is beautiful, just as Fall is beautiful. It’s just different. And during the winter, hardships aren’t escaped. But the day’s are never the same…and often time the beauty is simply stunning. So as we prepare for the cold winter months…we can rest in knowing that God is with us. He reminds us of that, in the way we see how even the squirrels (and birds of the air) are provided for, and in the sunshine, beautiful leaves, brilliant skies, or snow covered trees. Beauty…God’s creation…can also be seen in the strength that rises within us during the difficult times. I think it’s the times when we feel the weakest…the times that are totally out of our control…when God wants to show us His power…and remind us that His power isn’t bigger than the peace He gives us. His power is big enough to touch our hearts and gently comfort us…in such a personal way.

In his book, Fearless, Max Lucado talks about the power of fear:

Fear, at its center, is a perceived loss of control. When life spins wildly, we grab for a component of life we can manage: our diet, the tidiness of a house, the armrest of a plane, or, in many cases, people. The more insecure we feel, the meaner we become. We growl and bare our fangs. Why? Because we are bad? In part. But also because we feel cornered.

This Fall has brought me to thoughts of fear…fear that I am cornered…I have no control. What else might happen???!!! The beauty in the difficulties is in the realization that this is likely exactly what God wants me to learn, as He allowed these hardships to happen in my life this Fall…that control isn’t what should give me confidence, but TRUST in Him should give me confidence and therefore dissolve all my fears.

So, an excitement just rose within me as I watch the leaves come off the trees…a little sadness, but also an excitement. I don’t know what’s next…what’s around the corner…but I want to trust that I don’t need to be in control. I’m honestly not quite there yet, but I want to be. I’m kinda excited to see what’s next…

The Artist, Sidewalk Prophets, leaves me with peace in these words from the song The Words I Would Say:

Be strong in the Lord
And never give up hope
You're gonna do great things
I already know God's got His hand on You
So don't live life in fear
Forgive and forget
But don't forget why you're here
Take your time and pray
These are the words I would say

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