Anticipation

Looking ahead towards what is to come can be incredibly overwhelming. Even excitement can be stressful. We began the process toward moving back "home" to Clinton last December. In January we knew we would be coming back for certain, and the wait for the official announcement two months later made it difficult to contain my excitement. Our decision to enroll Gabe in Kindergarten was made at that point and even Gabe got weary of looking forward to "real school" and wondered if it would ever happen. The wait continued another two months, as we waited for our house in PA to sell and then make the trek back to Clinton. At that point we finally knew where we would live (in another two months), and I could hardly contain the excitement of hopefully making an influence in the lives of eight young teenage boys.

Finally, Labor Day weekend the anticipation came to a head and we welcomed the boys "home" to the ABC House and began our orientation with them. Just a few days later our own boy started Kindergarten, and despite a small hiccup of missing the school bus and being disappointed in that (and late to school!), everything went well.

Whew. All that waiting and all the anticipation of exciting things to come was just so emotionally draining. And the tears flowed. The exhaustion was overwhelming and my body is adjusting to a different pace and outlook now that things will be more steady. It's amazing just how stressful being excited can be!

Reflecting upon the past week (and 9 months!), I can't help but think about how God would like us to be excited about eternal life with Him. Our daily lives are a distraction from what we cannot even fathom is to come. And He wants us to experience life here on Earth, even though He wants us to think about what lies ahead and not get "settled" in this life.

I can only take one moment at a time. Even when I know what might come down the road, I need to focus on the here and now. Even though I know the "bus" is coming, I won't always know when. Sometimes we'll miss the bus. But God has something to show us, speak to us, and teach us with each passing moment. Lord, help me to rely on you, not my schedule or even feelings. Help me not to miss out on what YOU want to show me with each passing moment.