what you meant as a compliment is too heavy for me and makes me too warm to have that laid upon my shoulders. i've felt it before and enjoyed it too much, and now i've been tempered by the indulgence of it. pride-taming does that.
so when you say that i'm strong and all that, i want to take your face in my hand and turn you around and up and everywhere else but at me. because He did this. there is nothing i could ever do to have made me this way, and believe me when i say that i tried.
beauty has cascaded across the dark canvas of my life (and of others) and i've been changed because of it.
there was once a day when i wanted to die and truthfully, that day wasn't too long ago. My Father holds me tight and i know i'm here by His grace, alone. i know it is He who has kept me strong.
i've seen my heart changed and how beauty has unraveled from choices i've made, even dark ones that still come with much shame. when you see glory like this, and magnificence, there's no going back and perspective is forever changed. it's happened to me.
Joy shows herself and Hope becomes easier to step into when Grace is unwrapped.
i wondered if He was true and then i chose to step into faith, and now my grip of fear is held loose to accept what.ever. may Be -- however grueling or gruesome the gift.
so when you see strength, my heart cries that you see Him and not me. because all of this -- every bit of my life -- is all because of His grace.
this is my worship.