His love for me is becoming increasingly more evident in the *whirl and twirl* of my living.
Returning to the office after two-weeks of vacation, I find discouragement over anticipated disappointment. I had a feeling my boss might let me down and all the work I had set up might come crashing down.
My idol of pride smashed to pieces. The one that says, Look at what I did, and, You owe me.
Choosing to forgive the delinquencies of others is hard stuff to grapple with every day. It's a laying down of self. A choosing of a perspective that is not only inexplainable, but most obviously evidence of Him.
I feel less than in how I responded to others. So grace-less. And yet...
He leads me to breathe anyway, and step forward into the next moment anyway. And the exact people who I feel less than towards, they say that they appreciate the grace that pours out of me. I question how that could be possible since I've flopped like a fish out of water.
He tells me He's bigger *in* me than I can ever begin to imagine.
Friends give me compliments and I struggle. Again, fish-like. Uncomfortable out of my element.
And I see. It's His design.
This discomfort and this flopping and this frustration, it's all for purpose. It teaches me so much more than I can possibly understand now, though one thing I do begin to see is Grace.
I'm honored to be a temple for Him. Changed, in fact, from the circumstances in my week--the simple ones--that have led me to His feet. Not dragged, but gracefully led.
Today's post was part of my friend, Lisa-Jo's fun challenge each Friday to
"Write for five, short, bold beautiful minutes...
Unscripted and unedited...
Without worrying if it's just right or not."
...where, community comes together and shares how He used their five minutes on the same topic.
It's neat stuff and most especially, such evidence of our uniqueness and His awesomeness.
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Oh how lovely.
ReplyDeleteI have to admit that I might have internally jumped for joy when I saw that I was linked right after you!!
This is perfection... and AMEN.
I so appreciate these honest words, Amy. I know the ugliness of that pride, I'm inflicted with it myself. SO many times I behave so poorly, feeding that beast rather than squelching it. I love this, and I love you. Praying for you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteWhat a powerful and real post, Amy! Personally, I've been on a road of forgiving and asking others to forgive me for offenses. This line, in particular, grabbed me today --> Choosing to forgive the delinquencies of others is hard stuff to grapple with every day. It's a laying down of self. Yes!! It is laying down of self ~ period. It's humbling to forgive and humbling to ask for forgiveness.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your words...
This line: "This discomfort and this flopping and this frustration, it's all for purpose." Oh...Amy!! Thank you..this is just what I needed to be reminded of today. You blessed me with this post.
ReplyDeleteMary
http://memyselfandmercy.blogspot.com/
I'm with Mary and ditto the other comments thus far. That "fish" moment is one that I feel more often than not. I have learned to nearly chant "everything in the heavens and earth belongs to you oh Lord" reminding myself of His sovereignty even when I long the comfort of the water.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post as always. Have a great day.