Tuesday, March 1, 2011

{Gracefully} deliberating...and then *moving forward*

There's a lot of thinking happening in my family.  And I admit, we *talk a lot* about what we're going to do, and then when the time gets there we aren't so sure anymore.  It's happening out loud with our six-year-old boy-man.  He hears us.  He knows we're talking about what will happen, and even if we've included a *might* in there - he doesn't always hear it, and yet sometimes he does.  I can hear him in my mind emphasizing "we MIGHT..."

There are a lot of might's.

We're at the point in the boy-man's life where we're deliberating a lot of options.  So many options.

With my Gram and Gramp's passing, we have an option to inherit their piano - do we get it, have it evaluated first and then decide, or forgo the initial costs of having it inspected, moved, tuned, and tuned again and again and again...?  Or do we get a simple keyboard?

The boy-man has asked for piano lessons {like a little girl-friend of his}, and so we've encountered many choices for instructors.  And now we're facing the selection of what day and time would be best for him to take lessons.

Then there's soccer that we didn't consider for the Spring when we registered him for the Fall - unaware it's a two (seasons) for the price of one deal.  But we don't know what day practices will be this Spring.

And then there's lacrosse that the boy-man mentioned (along with baseball), and it's pretty costly for just a handful of weeks, and if we aren't certain he'll like it.  We could skip it altogether this year, but then it'd be a whole year until he has the opportunity again, and he wants to try it now if he can.

How do we know if the cost is worth it?  

We don't know enough information to make a decision - an informed decision.

Do we take the plunge and move forward and hope that the schedules will work out?

Do we hope that the boy-man will like lacrosse and that equipment will get used past this season?

At what point does the cost become worth it? 

The choices we're carefully deliberating are simple ones in the grand scheme of things.  Schedules and sports schedules and piano teachers.  Simple.

But this is our life.  These are our days.  This is our family.  

What we choose to do with our time really does matter.  Each day matters.

And so, as we deliberate and weigh options and such, we need to be graceful about it.  Not too focused that we lose track of what we're doing or where we're going.  Not too care free that we lose our balance and spin out of control with craziness.

Life whirls and twirls around us.  Will we dance along with it?  Or will we sit out and watch?  Will we try to find a way to play along in a way that works for us, for a time or a season?

We will not achieve perfection and so there's a time when it calls for getting off our duff, putting down the paper and pen, and moving forward - one step at a time.  Even the stepping can seem daunting, and so just the standing up and stepping out of the boat is what we need to do - trusting that our Father has our back.

I still don't know what to do or what we'll do as a family with these multitudes of options, but I'm putting all of this in my Father's Hands.  He knows what's best and although I may still need to make a decision before I'm fully ready, His Grace is big enough and His Love is wide enough to cover it all, and show me that I'll grow, even in the wrong turns.

Nothing is wasted.  

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