Thursday, February 24, 2011

{Grace} for a mother and daughter

That picture up there says a lot.

A mother and daughter walking forward, together.  Arms wrapped around each other.

Such. Grace.

And we - my mother and I - didn't get to this place easily.

Grace doesn't come without pain.

Someone usually suffers for grace to be displayed.  And suffer we did for many years as we got tangled up in ourselves.  Expectations unrealized.  Pain raw.  Feelings unidentified.

She has fought to keep me close to her.  When I was younger, this woman made mistakes and was challenged because of them, and then she fought and seemed to have won.  And then she realized the battle wasn't her own, and that I'd have my own opinion and feelings and thoughts to attack her with.  And I did.  I staged my own fight and together we lived among each other and our anger, fears and disappointment.

It took years for me to realize that life with her has helped me to *see* - So. Much. Grace.  Living with her in my days has helped me to see grace in such beautiful ways.

Such. Love.

Circumstances have happened in my life and with my mother that I wished hadn't.  Now I can say that I am grateful.  Truly grateful for every one of them.

It is the hard times that God uses to chisel out ourselves and help us to learn how to trust Him for what He intends for our lives.  

It is in the moments of living when we learn that He can take anything and make it beautiful.  Any. Thing. 

Nothing and no one is beyond His grasp.

As I started growing up, I challenged my mother and her choices.  I hurt her and I even hated her.  And then, Grace gave me days and moments within those days to grow in the hurt.

Skinned knees led to stronger knees.

Into the third decade of my life and she now in her fifth, we've learned a lot in our journey of life.  Our lives have many similarities and yet still many differences.  We are two different people with two different hearts and two different minds.  She isn't my Savior and I am not hers.  And yet, God has used us both in truly amazing ways to bring healing to our hearts.

I've learned more about Love and Grace as I've grown up, 
                       and I sense she has, too.  

Our journey's aren't over and as frustrated as we sometimes get of each other and judge that the other isn't living her life the right way, or in a way we know think to be better, we are learning to trust and allow each other to live...and let ourselves collide with Love and receive Grace again and again.

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